Bitmaniac

I was absolutely amazed after reading an article in the Canadian magazine Maclean entitled "Preteen Temptress". Patricia Pearson writes how the natural look Naked vixen (in the style of Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears) is out and a more demure look of buttoned sweaters and skirts past the knee is in style. Great. I was never really crazy about that look.

However, at the end of his piece, Pearson provides a connection between indifference "to sexual advances, so innocently taken by these children "and newspaper headlines announcing casually children perform oral sex and therefore sometimes recruited Transmitted Diseases (STDs). Huh?

Pearson wrote some mail to say disturbed that the dress has nothing to do with the promiscuity of a child. Also suggested perhaps some research on childhood sexuality must be done before you put these items in front of thousands of parents who want to do my best to their young children. She wrote me a not-so-happy response.

Sometimes it's best just to keep my mouth shut. Especially when it comes to the kingdom dark of infantile sexuality. In reality, whose side is the average parent will take when it comes to your child? Probably the side buttoned sweaters and skirts to the knee.

Why, then, many parents desperate to get advice on talking to children about sexuality? Even my teenage sending a e-mail for advice. I never answer these teenagers for fear that speaking with a person under 18 years about his sexuality will take me a lot of problems. Instead, I refer to appropriate educational teen websites.

What scares me about the Macleans article points the finger of blame at the source wrong. In my opinion, not a lack of clothing that is encouraging children to do things before you're ready: it is a lack of sexual knowledge. If parents (yes, that parents, not schools or other educational sites) does not provide children with adequate information about sex positive, children naturally go to find out themselves.

How many generations of children exposed to sex in the backseat of a Chevy? The only difference today is that a doctor visit and an injection of penicillin to treat a sexual error without information will not eliminate HIV / AIDS.

In fact, study after study has shown that a child who is educated and comfortable with their bodies and sexuality will refrain from inappropriate sexual acts. I call it being sexually confident. Also, I think is just smart to have children well versed in sex before they go into their world of MTV.

Educating a child about sexuality starts at age zero and is a dialogue continuum that runs through when they leave the care of parents. The best age to talk to children about serious issues is pre-teen sex, 10 to 12 years. At this age, who have the curiosity to want to know and still searching for their parents as the best source of education. After age 13, most children refer to the opinions of friends and not their parents.

When talking to children about their sexuality, remember that it is much more than biology. Please do not misunderstand. A lot of much-needed sexual confidence occurs when a child can name all body parts and not have to use to refer to their pee genitals. It is also helpful to know exactly how to create a baby, how to use a condom to protect from outside pregnancy and disease transmission nasty sex, and how to use all contraceptive methods available to them.

However, much of the parents or the child's sexuality should Discussions revolve around questions uncomfortable and absolutely critical. For example, common questions email me they are adolescent, "When I know I'm ready to have sex? "or" How can I talk to my partner about using a condom? "or" I do not want, but somehow say no. "

I receive you as a parent, these are difficult to have conversations with someone who has a young mind, a body of an adult and a lot hormone to full speed running. However, an honest discussion and evaluation of child sexual maturity is much better than the counsel of the possible abuse child's best friend.

In the end I am pleased that parents and adolescents are asking questions. Fortunately, many books and websites that provide information solid help all along this crazy journey sex in adulthood. They also help parents filter out bad items that can only cause needless worry.

Go to: http://www.bestsextipsever.com/ for your free podcasts. Or to for more great and informative articles go to: http://www.trinaread.com/articles/

Dr. Trina is an author, sought after regular television and radio show guest, spokesperson, magazine columnist, former national sex newspaper columnist and internationally acclaimed speaker.

Pat Pearson View from the Bay 1.13.09

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